Copyright © 2019 Nina Joshi Ramsey

The most important thing to know

February 21, 2016

 

You have to take charge. 

That's really the most important thing.

And when you do, remember that you are amongst humans. At some point that may help matters. We see on websites and streets in some countries that often children who are born in the worst of circumstances go out and beg or sell things to feed themselves or their families. They could sit and accept their difficult existence, or point fingers at others responsible for their circumstances. Instead, they have to effectively start looking after themselves. Even if this is a day-by-day approach, at the end of the week, they are still there. At the end of the year, they are a year older. At the end of 10, they could be adults. A day-by-day approach has led to them being alive ten years on. How obvious yet amazing, from where they started. So if you don't think you can, take a small step everyday.

 

If you have an ultimate goal, it could add vigour and direction. And working back will tell you each step you need to take. A child in the above circumstances might see a person driving a car and want that for themselves. Working back, they may decide to offer a cleaning service to the driver, and hope to inherit the car one day. However misplaced that faith may be, it will help them decide on a plan and take a step. Because they are not going to have a dream one day and the achieve it the very next day. It's a journey that can be plotted and adjusted as new information presents itself. And it can be uphill and we may have doubts and want to give up. Looking at nature around us helps to know that when you don't have the choice of giving up, you just take it in your stride, one step at a time. I had an amazing experience of this when I saw a beetle in the Namib desert. It climbing sand uphill to get to it's destination. The sun was high and beating down. It is built differently to me and perhaps didn't feel the fatigue I did. I was ready to sit for a rest, but seeing that beetle had served its purpose. We all climb our personal mountains and a step at a time is alright.

 

I love working with people on their personal mountains at work and home. Sometimes it comes down to brilliant confidence, but confusion or hesitance in a particular area. Normal stuff. It's helpful then to unpack and clarify the end goal, which starts to reveal a set of small steps. Often the end goal is not a physical thing, but rather the underlying emotions. Wanting to be wealthy could be the translation for someone wanting to feel safe from the financial independence they feel they could get from wealth. Often working on that safety aspect also helps to dissipate fears and doubts or to address them in a way that provides reassurance. 

 

 

 

Sometimes uncertainty about a situation can cause at least temporary discomfort. Understanding the authenticity in your reaction and talking through the situation can help reveal more. Often there is much relief at that point. Things that are unsaid but felt are as powerful detractors of moving forward in life. When the decks are cleared enough, in most cases it is possible to see the mountain through a lens of doability. A reliable step-by-step reviewable plan in keeping with the authentic needs can itself gain short-term and long-term relief. 

 

Often clarity in thinking or decision-making is clouded by stress. This can hinder seeing the wood for the trees so a clear step-by-step plan doesn't even seem possible or powerful enough to address the situation. One of the most important things I have learned for modern life is to manage stress and experience the clarity you benefit from that. Nothing will seem clear in muddy waters. But the same things are reacheable when we take charge to clean-up. Managing stress is an internal clean-up of chemicals that can be toxic to our bodies and mind. Then the step approach is much easier see and follow through. But you have to take charge of managing your stress so that you can do what you want to or need to do. So that you can have some freedom in your mind and perhaps life. It may not be easy, but taking charge is freeing.

 

 

 

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